Humanistic - you are you and all your potential
The humanistic approach starts from the position of seeing you as a whole person, recognising your inherent worth, autonomy, potential, and uniqueness. It doesn’t view people as a set of problems to be ‘cured’, but as individuals in search of understanding, meaning, authenticity, and acceptance.
Looks to help people in becoming more of a human being, rather than a human doing. Many of the difficulties we face arise from ‘creative adjustments’ we’ve made along the way, like inner rules or narratives, — ways of surviving our environment or protecting our relationships. Sometimes following these can be life-limiting, exhausting, and lead to guilt, shame, stress or sadness.
Together, we can explore how you feel you ‘should’ be, bringing gentle awareness to these internal messages, and consider which ones might now be softened or let go of — freeing energy, reconnecting with what truly matters to you, and opening space for new choices.
Key figures & respective approaches
Carl Rogers - Person-Centred Therapy
Abraham Maslow - Self-actualisation and the Hierarchy of Needs
Rollo May - Emphasising the struggle of being human in an uncertain world.
Fritz Perls - Gestalt Therapy — while often seen as a separate approach, Emphasised awareness, responsibility, and the here-and-now.
James Bugental - Described therapy as “the journey of the self toward itself.”
Core principles of the humanistic approach:
Healing happens in relationship — not through diagnosis or interpretation, but through a safe, attuned, and accepting connection.
Here-and-now focus — what’s alive in the present moment often holds the roots of long-held patterns or protective strategies.
Self-actualisation — we each have an innate movement toward growth, healing, and wholeness.
Wholeness — you are not just your thoughts or behaviours, but a person with emotions, a body, relationships, a spirit, and a desire for life.
Working with, not on — therapy is collaborative, rooted in presence and respect. I don’t aim to fix you, but to walk alongside you.
Object Relations - relational by design
Object relations is a school of thought and scientific research that spans over 100 years. They were the first group of people to move away from a Freudian way of thinking about humans to a more holistic view.
We are born into relationship — our earliest bonds with caregivers, especially the mother, form the roots from which our sense of self grows. If those early relationships are attuned and responsive — not perfect, but good enough — they create a foundation of trust and safety from which we can explore the world and relate to others.
When early care falters — through misattunement, absence, or trauma — the young psyche protects itself by splitting: separating off painful feelings or parts of the self that feel unacceptable or overwhelming. These early survival strategies often become the blueprint for how we relate and cope in later life, repeating patterns that were once protective but may now cause distress.
Object Relations theory offers a way of understanding how our internal world is built from these early relational experiences. We may find ourselves repeating old dynamics, drawn to familiar roles or struggling with feelings that don’t seem to fit the present — because they echo the past. We carry inner “objects” — impressions of others and ourselves — which shape our emotional life and relationships. And while those early patterns run deep, they are not set in stone.
Attachment theory strengthens this view. It shows that our need for connection is not just emotional, but biological. These early experiences shape how we regulate feelings, form bonds, and handle closeness. But we remain capable of change.
Within a therapeutic relationship that is attuned, boundaried, and “good enough,” old wounds can be re-experienced in safer ways — allowing us to integrate what was once split off and rediscover more of who we are..
Key figures:
Melanie Klein – Introduced the concept of internal “objects” - people we have relationship with.
Ronald Fairbairn – Argued that humans are fundamentally object-seeking, not just pleasure-seeking.
Donald Winnicott – Developed the idea of the “good enough” caregiver, and the “facilitating environment” needed for healthy emotional development.
John Bowlby – Founded attachment theory, showing that early bonds with caregivers are biologically driven.
Harry Guntrip – Explored how early relational trauma shapes our inner emotional world, especially the need to protect the self through withdrawal or detachment.
Core principles of Object Relations
We are inherently relational — our self forms and develops in connection with others.
“Good enough” care (Winnicott) means the caregiver adapts to the child’s needs without needing to be perfect — providing just enough attunement and holding to support healthy development.
Our internal world is shaped by early relational experiences, carried as “objects” — inner versions of those who mattered most.
Attachment is a biological and emotional need (Bowlby, Ainsworth); it shapes how we bond, trust, and self-regulate.
Healing is possible — therapy offers a new relational experience that supports growth and change.
The therapeutic relationship becomes a “facilitating environment” — a space to explore, rework, and integrate early relational experiences.
Self-Psychology - Who am I? Can I be me?
Self Psychology focuses on how our sense of self, our identity, is formed and sustained through relationships. It highlights that we all need to feel seen, understood, and emotionally connected to others in order to develop a stable, solid sense of who we are.
It suggests that when those needs aren’t met early in life — perhaps through mistuned or emotionally absent caregivers — parts of the self can feel fragile, fragmented, or uncertain. At the heart of this approach, as with the other approaches I draw on, is the idea that we need others not just to survive, but to feel real, valued, and whole.
When our - essential and very reasonable - needs have gone unmet, we often develop strategies to protect ourselves — sometimes by becoming overly self-reliant, overly pleasing, by running away or disconnecting from our emotional world altogether.In therapy, healing can begin within the experience of a relationship that is attuned, responsive, and emotionally present.
I aim to offer that kind of space — where you can begin to feel safe enough to express needs, process old pain, and reconnect with a stronger, more coherent sense of self.Self-psychology suggests 4 key 'needs' being;
Mirroring – “Do you see me? Do I matter?”We all need to feel seen, understood, and emotionally recognised — especially in our strengths, struggles, and uniqueness. When this didn’t happen enough growing up, we might now feel invisible, unimportant, or unsure of our inherent worth.
Idealising – “Can I lean on you? Are you steady enough to hold me?”As children, we need figures we can look up to — people who feel strong, calm, wise, or comforting. When this isn’t available, we might struggle to feel safe or contained.
Twinship – “Am I like you? Do I belong?”We need to feel a sense of likeness or connection with others — to not feel completely different, alien, or alone. When this need goes unmet, we might feel isolated or like there’s something wrong with us. In therapy, we may look for a sense of shared experience, a sense that the therapist “gets it” not just from the outside, but from a place of felt humanity.
Adversarial/Assertive – “Can I push against you and still be okay?”We need to feel safe enough to disagree, push back, or assert ourselves without fear of rejection or collapse.
Key figures
Heinz Kohut – Founder of Self Psychology - we need empathic relationships to stay cohesive and grow
Ernst Wolf – Focused on how the self can fall apart under stress and how therapy can restore a sense of wholeness.
Marian Tolpin – Showed how small, missed opportunities for connection in early life could be repaired.
Frank Lachmann – Explored how early interactions shape our sense of being seen and valued.
Arnold Goldberg –Emphasised how fragile self-esteem and identity can be healed in relationship.
Core principles of Self Psychology:
Core Principles:The self forms in relationship — our early emotional environment plays a key role in shaping how solid, valued, or connected we feel as a person.
Self-object needs are central — we need others to mirror, affirm, and stabilise us in order to feel whole.
Disruption without repair can wound the self — unmet emotional needs can lead to feelings of emptiness, shame, or a fragile sense of identity.
Therapy offers a reparative relationship — through attuned, empathic connection, old wounds can be felt, understood, and gradually healed.
Growth happens through empathic attunement — being deeply seen and known allows us to develop a more stable, resilient self.
Psychodynamic - - the present can be where the past is at.
The psychodynamic approach looks at how past relationships and experiences quietly shape your present — often without you realising. As children, we absorb unspoken rules and emotional messages about parents, carers, authority, and ourselves — learning how to stay safe in relationships. These early impressions often follow us into adulthood, leading to repeated patterns that once protected us but may now leave us feeling stuck, anxious, or confused.
You might wonder, Why does this keep happening? Why do you fall into familiar roles, attract the same kinds of relationships, or struggle with feelings that seem too big? These are often echoes from your past reaching into the present.
In therapy, I’ll create a gentle, safe space to explore what lies beneath the surface — those long-held beliefs, protective strategies, and parts of your experience that might have been pushed out of awareness.
Our relationship becomes a testing ground where old patterns can begin to shift. Together, we’ll explore difficult feelings like sadness, anger, or shame, understanding where they come from — not just in your thoughts, but deep in your emotional and relational history.
Psychodynamic work isn’t about judging or fixing. It’s about understanding — making sense of how your inner world was shaped and finding new, freer ways to relate to yourself and others.
Key figures
Sigmund Freud – The founder of psychoanalysis who introduced ideas about the unconscious mind and childhood shaping adult life.
Melanie Klein – Explored how early infant emotions shape inner worlds and relationships through unconscious fantasies.
Donald Winnicott – Highlighted the importance of the “good enough” mother and how early holding shapes emotional development.
Carl Jung – Focused on the collective unconscious and archetypes that influence our personal and shared psychological experience.
Wilfred Bion – Developed ideas about how we process emotions and experiences, especially in relationships and therapy.
Jacques Lacan – Emphasized language, desire, and how our sense of self is formed through social interactions.
Core principles of Psychodynamic Approach:
Much of our experience is shaped by the unconscious — feelings and parts of ourselves we may push away or hide.
Early relationships set the emotional tone for how we relate to ourselves and others.
We often repeat old coping patterns until we bring them into awareness and work through them.
The therapeutic relationship acts like a mirror, revealing deeper relational patterns ready to be understood and changed.
Insight and integration create space for choice, freedom, and deeper emotional life.
Interpersonal neurobiology - becoming aware
Interpersonal neurobiology brings together insights from neuroscience, neurophysiology, attachment theory (object relations), psychology, mindfulness, and physics to explore our ways of being in the world. Our brain and body are viewed as an interconnected whole - from which our minds and sense of self emerge.
Central is the idea that our minds aren’t just something we have – they’re something we develop through connection and within relationship with others. From birth onwards, our nervous systems are shaped by the people around us. Relationships – especially the attuned, emotionally safe ones – help our minds to grow, regulate and heal.
When those early relationships were stressful, unpredictable, or unsafe, we often develop ways to cope that affect how we feel, relate, and regulate emotion. You might notice this in patterns like shutting down under stress, feeling constantly on edge, or struggling to feel connected. These responses aren’t signs of something wrong with you – they’re your nervous system’s way of trying to keep you safe - and as they were created in conjunction with another - they can be re-made in a new relationship.
These ideas also see The Self not as a fixed thing, but as made up of multiple self-states — different ways of being that emerge depending on our mood, context, and relationships. You might feel calm and capable at work, playful or sensitive with loved ones, and vulnerable or unsure when you’re under pressure. These variations are part of being human. Our child self, for instance, doesn’t disappear as we grow older — it lives on in the moments we dance, laugh, long for comfort, or feel hurt.
Sometimes, especially after trauma, we can get stuck in one self-state — feeling fragmented or cut off from other parts of ourselves. Therapy can help you get to know these parts of yourself and bring more ease and connection between them — so you feel more whole and at home in who you are.
In our work together, I will support you not just through talking, but by paying attention to how your patterns show up in the body, in emotion, and in the moment-to-moment flow between us. We might notice your breathing as you speak, the way you hold tension, or how your body responds to certain memories — and bring curiosity and care to those signals.
Over time, I hope we can create new, co-regulating experiences that strengthen your nervous system’s flexibility and widen your window of tolerance — the range within which you can feel, reflect, and respond without becoming overwhelmed.
Change doesn’t come from insight alone, but through experience — through feeling safe, connected, and understood in the present moment. From that foundation, new ways of relating to yourself and others can begin to grow.
Key figures
Daniel Siegel – Coined the term Interpersonal Neurobiology, showing how mind, brain, and relationships shape each other continuously.
Allan Schore – Highlighted the role of early attachment in shaping the right brain and emotional regulation.
Stephen Porges – Developed Polyvagal Theory, explaining how our nervous system responds to safety and threat in relationships.
Iain McGilchrist – Explores how the brain’s two hemispheres shape our experience of the world, showing the importance of balance between reason and intuition, detail and meaning.Louis Cozolino – Explores how social connection changes the brain throughout life, emphasising the healing power of relationships.
Bessel van der Kolk – A leading trauma researcher showing how trauma affects the brain and body, and how connection supports recovery.
Core principles of interpersonal neurobiology:
The mind is both embodied and relational – it arises through the flow of energy and information within us and between us.
Our nervous systems are shaped by relationships – especially early ones – and continue to adapt throughout life.
Integration is the goal – mental health involves linking different parts of our brain and experience into a balanced, flexible whole.
We all have a “window of tolerance” – the optimal zone where we can feel, think, and respond effectively. Trauma or stress can shrink this window; therapy can help expand it.
Change happens through experience, not just insight – being met with attunement and presence in the here-and-now helps to rewire old patterns at the level of brain and body.
Transactional Analysis. Can I be okay?
Transactional Analysis (TA) helps us understand the different parts within ourselves and how they shape our relationships, communication, and sense of self. It gives us a kind of helicopter view — a way to step back and see how our internal voices and emotional reactions might have started in early life, and how they’re playing out now.
At the heart of TA is the idea of ego states: our Parent, Adult, and Child. These aren’t roles we act out, but states of mind we move between. We might react like a child when criticised, or sound like a parent when we’re frustrated. At other times, we speak and act from a grounded, thoughtful Adult place.
These patterns can show up in everyday moments — like feeling suddenly small when your boss walks into the room, snapping at your partner in a way that echoes your own upbringing, or going quiet when you feel sad because expressing emotion never felt safe. TA invites us to explore these moments with curiosity, not judgment.
It also helps us understand the deeper “life scripts” we write early on — unconscious stories about who we are, what we deserve, and how relationships work. These scripts are shaped by childhood experience and often go unchallenged until we start to feel stuck.
Therapy can help you gently rewrite these outdated scripts, freeing up new possibilities.
TA also talks about the “games” we play — recurring emotional patterns or roles we fall into with others that often end in frustration or pain. Becoming aware of these games and why we play them helps us step out of old loops and connect in more honest, equal ways.
Ultimately, TA is about reclaiming your sense of agency. It’s grounded in the core belief that everyone is fundamentally OK — worthy of respect, connection, and the chance to grow.
Together, we can explore how your patterns were shaped, how they serve you, and how to create more choice, clarity, and connection in how you relate to yourself and others
Key figures:
Eric Berne – Founder of TA; introduced ego states, life scripts, and the concept of psychological “games.”
Claude Steiner – Expanded script theory and emotional literacy; championed the idea that we are all born lovable and worthy.
Richard Erskine – Brought a deeply relational lens to TA, focusing on unmet childhood needs, emotional attunement, and the healing power of presence in therapy.
Thomas Harris – Popularised TA with the phrase “I’m OK – You’re OK,” a cornerstone of TA’s humanistic philosophy.
Muriel James – Known for making TA accessible and relational, especially in the context of self-acceptance and growth.
Core principles ofTransactional Analysis
Ego States – We move between Parent, Adult, and Child states, each carrying patterns of feeling, thinking, and relating.
Transactions – Communication reflects which ego states are speaking; understanding this helps improve connection and reduce conflict.
Life Scripts – We unconsciously write “scripts” based on early experiences, which shape our beliefs, decisions, and relationships.
Games – We sometimes fall into familiar emotional patterns with others that repeat old hurts — becoming aware of these “games” helps us break the cycle.
Strokes – We all need recognition (“strokes”) to feel seen and valued; the way we seek or avoid this is shaped early on.
Being OK – TA is built on the belief that we are all OK at our core — even when we feel lost, overwhelmed, or unsure.
Awareness brings freedom – As we notice and understand our patterns, we open up more choice in how we live and relate.